L is for lust.

LOVE OR LUST ? OR BOTH ?

What differentiates love from lust ? Emotional and physiological components. Higher levels of hormones such as Dopamine, Serotonin ( I mentioned it in a previous post) are typical for romantic love. When we start feeling attached, we fall for a long- term relationship, commitment,  levels of Oxytocin fire up. This hormone is called 'hormone of love'. Also plays a significant role in experiencing orgasms, anxiety, social recognition, maternal and couples bonding processes :compare to symptoms showed while on drugs such as MDMA (ecstasy).

The conclusion: high levels of Oxytocin are correlated with romantic attachment.

Lust or sex drive/ an appetite for sex can also base on that process, but gets generated by increased testosterone levels ( happens for both men and women). Heightened levels of testosterone inspire a feeling of focused attention and sexual arousal.

Let's focus on psychological understanding of love and lust presented by women and men.

Women connect sex with attachment, intimacy, romance. Au contraire, men are focused on physical aspects such as body parts. Studies show something interesting: men tend to consider sex as more intimate than women do (!). We look at this from evolutionary point of view. Women give men a chance to transmit their genes.
What recent studies have shown is that good-looking couples tend to divorce more often. Simply, people see their opportunities to form new relationships faster than others.

Brain on love.

What happens in our brain when we are 'on love' ?

The neurologists have mapped the changes in our brain that occur when we are falling in love. The frontal cortex: vital to judgment, shuts down when we fall in love. MRI scans show this de-activation occurs only when someone is shown a photo of the person they adore, causing them to suspend all criticism or doubt. When we look at someone we are passionate about some parts shut down and some areas get activated. Some scientist truly believe the brain may behave in this way for ‘higher biological purposes’: simply for reproduction, but that doesn't sound very romantic. The put-to-sleep area also includes one  that controls fear and negative emotions. 

Numerous studies have shown a high levels of Dopamine, the key hormone to our experiences of pleasure and pain: (S&M ?) that links to euphoria, lust, addiction (!). Drugs such as cocaine have a similar effect on our brain. There's no joke in saying: 'Love is a drug'. 
Because the level of Dopamine gets higher than usual, our body experiences a reduction of Serotonin, a key hormone in our appetite and moods. It all links us to people with OCD (Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder). And also explains why in love we feel often jittery. 

What gives us a kick ? It's Adrenaline.
It brings all psychosomatic symptoms, such as faster heartbeat, dry mouth, sweated palms. Its amount also rises when we are frightened. The conclusion: people even a bit attracted to one another might fall in love if they experience some exciting or scary event together.  
Lure of forbidden love ?

I truly recommend this video on TED. Lecture by Hellen Fisher.

http://www.ted.com/talks/helen_fisher_tells_us_why_we_love_cheat.html

L is for love.

I would like to dedicate that post to my friend: my inspiration, my motivation, often my mind's miroir..

Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. How much I want to escape it, it's always around the corner. In the bakery, in mail, on NYTimes's website that I read every morning.. It makes me think about love and relationships. I can't help but wonder: do we define ourself by our close, romantic relationships ? Does being in a relationship makes us a whole person ? Many questions driving my mind insane. Sure we need love, we need safety, happiness, true thing. We need fulfilling, crazy, devastating, can't- live- without- you feeling. Why is it ?

Psychologist say romantic love lasts one year. What comes after that is love out of the attachment to someone. Then, what motivates people to seek love? Our primary motivation as human beings is to expand the self and to increase our abilities and our effectiveness. One of the ways we accomplish this is through our relationships with other people. 

As I looked online to find some research about THE subject I've realized: it's all the chemistry, no magic. Usually we fall in love with someone who we find attractive, and obviously appropriate for us. But... that person has to demonstrate he/she is attracted to us as well. It gives us an opportunity of self- expansion, it increases our self- esteem. 

What got me curious is the exception to that 'rule'. When our self- esteem is low, we tend to miss out on opportunities for falling in love. We are then, in some double misery. It shows how important it is, to feel good about ourselves, to admire our possibilities of growth, to acknowledge our value.

And when do we fall in love ? Contrary to the common belief, the statistics show that most people fall in love with someone that they have known for a while. Of course, it happens differently between cultures. Aside from the physical attractiveness we look at two attributes: kindness and intelligence. It brings no connection to what we SEE when we meet someone. So, how it happens?  Intelligence is important in all aspects of life: especially in love. Kindness is the strongest indicator for a successful long-term relationship.

How true is it ?

What is love, and what is lust. Stay tuned...

Hot spots in Kraków < Charlotte >

I've decided to start a new cycle of posts about places you can enjoy in Kraków, Poland.

Breakfast @ Charlotte Kraków

Today, I would like to recommend you an amazing place, opened on May 12th called Charlotte. Three sisters, who lived in France for some time, decided to open their very first, chic place in Warsaw, a year later- in Kraków. In very cozy interiors, you enjoy a fresh bread and a baguette, all baked on leaven from wild grapes, delicious croissants, freshly squeezed juices.. The most amazing part is you can have that incredibly tasty breakfast all day long! And they open at 7am ! ;)

I usually spend my lunchtime there, with my girlfriends. Enjoying a carafe of amazing french wine, hot sandwiches- my fav' is  'mozzarella with black olives tapenade'.

Mozzarella avec tapenade

Assiette de charcuterie

Croque- Madame pour Dominique

Downstairs awaits you a little surprise- the bakery..

I highly recommend this place. Prices are reasonable and I can guarantee you, the good mood won't leave you even for one minute when you are there !

http://www.bistrocharlotte.pl/

My Birthday Girl

un éclair !

It really is a small bite of France in Kraków ! Enjoy !

Charlotte, Plac Szczepański 2.

¡Hola Sevilla!

The Sevillians are great actors and put on an extraordinary performance at their annual Fería de Abril, a week-long party of drink, food and dance (!) which takes place day and night in more than a thousand tents.

the view from the Cathedral's Tower

The Cathedral

How to celebrate? The easiest way is to attend a flamenco show. Incredible musicians and dancers. The best ones usually take place in mysterious spots and start around midnight.

Flamenco

Do not forget to try amazing local cuisine. TAPAS- are a wide variety of appetizers, served cold or warm. Any kind of fried seafood- the best is a little octopus, salads of any kind (for example Ensaladilla rusa) or simply... las croquetas !

In my opinion best place to go in Sevilla are EME restaurants. Two restaurants and a café held in one building, next to the Cathedral, a massive gothic masterpiece.

http://www.emecatedralhotel.com/en/restaurants/

Las croquetas @ EME

Jamón serrano @ San Sebastian

Reales Alcázares de Sevilla is the royal palace,one of the best remaining examples of mudéjar architecture. Spectacular patio, incredibly huge gardens are one of official residences of the Royal Family. Must- go !

An amazing place to go to is Hotel Alfonso XIII. It's a five star hotel, but still you can get a cup of tea served in a very chic ceramic cup for a fair price. Treat is as another stop to make, on your way from Plaza de España to The Cathedral ! Simply magical and chic.

Hotel Alfonso XIII

Lemon tree in front of the hotel..

Bienvenido a Sevilla !

Viva la pasta in New York !

I haven't been around for a very long time.. I kept searching for the right subjects. Finally, I've got a few.. 

Because my second favorite thing in life is food (!), I would like to share with you some thoughts about the greatest restaurants in NYC. Italian ones..


People who know me here are well aware of the fact that I just adore everything that's Italian. Especially 'cucina italiana'! 

In 1931 a long-sought dream became reality. Giuseppe Cipriani opened the doors to Harry's Bar in Venice.. Then he became opening restaurants in Italy, USA, Hong Kong..
The first and most important italian restaurant in New York is CIPRIANI DOWNTOWN.


Address: 376 West Broadway
Between Spring & Broome Streets
New York, New York 10012

Enormously amazing experience and your peek of the trip! The secret of Cipriani isn't about what can be seen or touched, but what can be felt and sensed. It is intangible but palpable.

Definitely you can meet inside many Celebrities, who just as same as I do, adore this place.

Design inside? Breathtaking. For a moment you can feel like you are in Venice @ Harry's Bar.

Cipriani Downtown

What to order ?

Appetizers: Baby artichoke salad and avocados with shaved parmesan, Prosciutto crudo from Parma, Marinated salmon and asparagu, Baccalá mantecato with grilled polenta. Everything is simply perfect here !

Main Course:  Scampi thermidor is my fav'.

Desserts: Meringata alla crema, Crêpes alla crema, Triple layer chocolate cake

Decide yourself ; )

Don't forget to order first New York's Best Bellini. Served since 1948. It's made of juice of white peaches and Italian Prosecco wine.

Prices ? $$

Gigino Trattoria

Opened in 1994 in TriBeCa neighborhood. I have to tell, it's the best pizza in the area. 

Address: 323 Greenwich Street, New York, NY 10013

What to order?

Daily they have amazingly prepared menu for guests. I ate there very tasty Capellini Sirenetta- Angel hair with shrimp & arugula in a light tomato sauce.

Great service, extremely Italian and extremely handsome waiters ; )

Prices ? Reasonable. Around 18/20$ for main course.

GIORGIONE. Cucina Italiana Verita. 

Opened in 2001. Inside you can enjoy the fireplace, sip your prosecco and contemplate the delicious fare in a neighborhood friendly restaurant…

Address: 307 Spring Street

New York, NY 10013/ Between Hudson Street
and Greenwich Street

What to order?

Definitely any kind of pasta ! It's delicious.

Prices? Again, reasonable. Around 15/20$ for main course.

Empire State of Mind

Carrie: "Welcome to the age of un-innocence. No one has breakfast at Tiffany's and no one has affairs to remember."

This one sentence is the essence of New York.. at least the Big Apple I've known..

I guess for the first time I've visited NYC in 1997. It absorbed me completely. You look around you and you can see almost everything: some people running around Financial District wearing famous sneakers ( yep, every American got one, I never managed to buy), others wearing suits from last Ralph Lauren collection paired with Manolos.. extremely wealthy people driving thir limos, well- known yellow cabs, hoots all around.. SOHO, TriBeCa, Upper East Side, Central Park.. Robert De Niro, SJP, Anna Wintour, Annie Leibovitz, Woody Allen..

Later on I got to know this gorgeous city from Carrie's point of view.. One summer I bought all SATC DVDs and just kept watching. It is addictive... and it used to be very fashionable. Probably by that time I fell in love with fabulous Michael Kors and Ralph Lauren..

CARRE & MR BIG

Museums. There is no place like MoMa (Museum of Modern Art. Must see: Andy Warhol's or Mark Rothko's masterpieces.

http://www.moma.org/

MoMA 2010

The Guggenheim- a great home for contemporary, early modern art, renowned Impressionists and Post- Impressionists.

The Guggenheim. 2010

Most famous- The Metropolitan Museum of Art. American Louvre- on the other side of the Globe. It's big enough to spend a whole day inside ( plus it's always pretty crowded). But it's worth it !

http://www.metmuseum.org/

Inside the Met. 2011

What I always liked to do, when I had a free afternoon in the City... I walked to Bryant Park and The Public Library. It's magical inside. Not only because this place holds all the greatest love stories... I turned those visits into a nasty habit. First I used to buy - chicken and avocado sandwich- @ Pret A Manger across the street ( plus a little fruit salad), I sat down like every other American with my head up- staring at the sky and trying to get some tan. Most of men get their shirts off :-) No shame in it. Nothing you do in New York City could make you feel mortified... 20 minutes later... you are ready to storm the Library ; -)

Bryant Park

The Public Library inside. 2010

Speaking about the green zones... There is one place left to go. Central Park. Opened in 1857, on 341 ha. It's situated in the middle of the Manhattan island and it surely looks spectacular! See yourself !

Manhattan, the view from The Empire State Building. 2010

I guess that's all I could tell tonight.. Favorite places to be- on Sunday !